From Failure to Fantastic Opportunity- Seeing the Learning in Everyday Mistakes
Most of us have heard the quote by Thomas Alva Edison who said, “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” How easy it is to focus on those 10,000 failures and get discouraged rather than focusing on the wealth of information we’ve learned by trying something, even if we did not reach the desired outcome. Recently, my friend’s baby has been learning to walk. This has been a delightful period in her life to witness, seeing her face full of determination and surprised wonder when she manages to stay upright. Even when she thumps onto her bottom, she does not think, “God, I’m an idiot! I’ll never get this right.” She laughs, pulls herself up and tries again.
What a gift from the universe it is that babies and children do not naturally have the negative thoughts that often hold us back. How unfortunate it would be if the baby thought “Well, I’ve given it a few tries. I guess I’ll just scoot around on my bum for the rest of my life!” Instead, she naturally incorporates what she has learned into her next attempts. She does not have to talk herself into this, it just happens. Unfortunately, it is not as easy for many of us adults. We worry about failing, looking foolish, disappointing ourselves and others, getting hurt (physically or emotionally). All of these things make it hard to even get started on something new, much less give it a genuine effort.
But think of all the things you “failed” at that gave you the tools you need to succeed today.
Did you ride your bike on the first try?
Did your first romantic relationship work out?
What about tying your shoes?
Getting the job you really wanted?
Losing weight?
TRY THIS: Make a list of ten things you have ‘failed’ at in your life. For each thing on the list, think of at least one thing you learned from the experience that has contributed positively to your life in some way. Make an effort to see the benefit of not succeeding right away. And when those negative thoughts creep in, remember that it is learned behaviour, and it can be unlearned.
You can move yourself from a place of FAILURE TO FANTASTIC OPPORTUNITY! And here’s the good news. While this may not come naturally to many people, with some practice anybody can learn how to see the learning in any situation. It may seem small or irrelevant at the time, but keep it up and you’ll be surprised at the effect it has on your frame of mind and ability to move forward. When we start to see the opportunities before us as chances for growth, NO MATTER WHAT THE OUTCOME, the fear of trying something new lessens.
You get excited about challenges, instead of finding reasons to hold back. You learn to live with the outcome and see its benefits instead of being disappointed and frustrated. You get excited, enthusiastic and, eventually, you get what you want.
Meghann MacPherson is a Life/Wellness Coach and Certified Fitness Trainer who helps people get up, get moving and get what they want. Her company, Outrageous Life Design, encourages people to dream big and be fierce! Her specialties include body image/ self acceptance, establishing and maintaining a healthy lifestyle and connecting the emotional and physical selves through music and movement. Contact her at outrageouslifecoaching.com outrageouslifecoaching.com
